Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

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OnlyOneKenobi
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Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by OnlyOneKenobi »

Okay, so everyone already knows that Uwe Boll is probably the worst director ever - but I have never actually watched any of his movies, until recently that is... we decided to rent some DVD's one night, and my friend felt like watching "In the name of the King - A Dungeon Siege Tale" by Uwe Boll.

I warned him that Uwe Boll has a reputation of making terrible, terrible movies based on games - but he argued that the movie had a solid cast with the likes of Jason Statham, Claire Forelani, John Rhys Davies, etc.. and he reckoned it couldn't be that bad. Well, it turns out Uwe Boll deserves his reputation!

There is not one good thing about this movie... we couldn't even finish watching it as it was just too painful I will never, ever watch anything by Uwe Boll again, it's just too traumatic. :twisted:
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by Anthro »

Bloodrayne :roll: :sad3:
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by GreyWolf »

Alone in the dark ... my f**k it was terrible...

how does he get financed?
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by hideinlight »

The Postman (actually enjoyed it. Was a great movie at that time)
Postal (Had a few funny bits, like "mini me" and the monkeys. Osamo Bin Laden and George Bush being big buddies etc)
BloodRayne(That sex scene...The way she fought sometimes were true to the game, did I mention the sex scene?)

Interesting movies to watch for the first time around, although you'd have to be out of your bloody mind to watch em twice...
The upside is that any non Uwe Boll movie you watch afterwards will rock!!!
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by endev8003 »

I checked the list of movies he made on Imdb, and thankfully, I have never seen any of his. :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

@GreyWolf
Boll is able to acquire funding thanks to German tax laws that reward investments in film. The law allows investors in German-owned films to write off 100% of their investment as a tax deduction; it also allows them to invest borrowed money and write off any fees associated with the loan. The investor is then only required to pay taxes on the profits made by the movie; if the movie loses money, the investor gets a tax writeoff.

While Boll has received a lot of negative publicity regarding this funding method,[8] he was actually one of the few directors to use the tax shelter as intended. His films were financed, produced, and directed by a German company, which was the initial intention behind the tax shelter: to provide incentive for investment in German entertainment properties.
From Wikipedia

And on Imdb it lists that Bloodrayne 3 is in production and set to be released in 2009 :evil: :evil:
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by Manofwar »

Well...

You only need to watch something like "Seed" to see how far he is willing to push the limits on the "Shock" elements in a movie.

"Blackwoods" was also bad....

He would make "Great" movies, if someone gave him decent funding... {Not funds, he has to provide, to claim back from tax}

For what he lack in quality, he makes up in "Shock" and "Gore" .... {If yu into that} :twisted:
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by rustypup »

Manofwar wrote:For what he lack in quality, he makes up in "Shock" and "Gore"
so, dressing a pile of bull-faeces in a mini-skirt magically turns it into something other than what it is..... :roll: riiight....

uwe boll produces unmitigated crud... the fact that certain segments of society continue to spend money on subjecting themselves to his particular brand of ego-stroking is an indictment on the species...
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by senile »

Has anyone seen Uwe's movie adaption of Far Cry? http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0400426/
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by Manofwar »

the fact that certain segments of society
Thats his target market... If you not into that, do not watch it.

He will create, what people pay to see... {Is this an indictment on the species?.. nah... as you said.. "certain segments" .... }
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by rustypup »

Manofwar wrote:He will create, what people pay to see..
i may accept that we share this planet with hordes of braindead mouth-breathers... doesn't mean i have to accept their devaluation of the species as being fait accompli....
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by GreyWolf »

Manofwar wrote:... He would make "Great" movies, if someone gave him decent funding...
good strategy there my bud: someone is doing a crap job so lets give him MORE money! do you work for the government by any chance?
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by IcePick88 »

I watched the Dungeon Siege movie, not knowing it was this parra that made it. I thought it was just a crappy movie. Now I know it is a crappy movie, PLUS made by a crappy director.

I agree with GreyWolf. Give him more money and he will make more crappy movies. More money is not going to increase his talent.
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by Rayne »

Trailers only, and that was enough.
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by Manofwar »

Grey Wolf : Work.. What is that? I pimp myself out for 5 minutes and get paid 4 it.

rusty pup : Point taken... I still do not care... People do not care, life is g8 ... Now where are my pills? :|
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by Firestrm_ZA »

IcePick88 wrote:I watched the Dungeon Siege movie, not knowing it was this parra that made it. I thought it was just a crappy movie. Now I know it is a crappy movie, PLUS made by a crappy director.

I agree with GreyWolf. Give him more money and he will make more crappy movies. More money is not going to increase his talent.
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by OnlyOneKenobi »

Manofwar wrote:
He would make "Great" movies, if someone gave him decent funding... {Not funds, he has to provide, to claim back from tax}

For what he lack in quality, he makes up in "Shock" and "Gore" .... {If yu into that} :twisted:
Dungeon Siege had a $6m budget and it was still crap... increasing the budget doesn't improve the quality of the film...
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by Manofwar »

Where do you get your Movie stats from?

Gross Net / Budget etc... ? Imdb

I need a reliable resource for this... Just for nfo... {I do'nt want to pay for the nfo}
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by OnlyOneKenobi »

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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by hamin_aus »

Guys, guys, guys...

It seems we have got Uwe Boll all wrong...
He's not just a money-grubbing, pandering, no-talent hack. He's a sesitive artists who only makes "commercial" movies to bankroll his passion for making movies about the stuff he really cares about. Like Auschwitz.

http://www.denofgeek.com/movies/21314/u ... reputation

That lnk contains my new favourite quote:
Uwe Boll wrote: I thought we can bring some freshness into that whole thing to have a contemporary guy going back into medieval times.

We can add a lot of humour, also; like, ‘where’s the toilet?’, you know? All this kind of stuff
:lol: Oh Uwe, you cut-up!
The writers for Hangover 3 need to get you on-board
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Re: Have you ever seen a Uwe Boll movie?

Post by OnlyOneKenobi »

Goodness gracious, great Bolls of fire!
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