The Ward of Wierd

Kher-za · Post by **Kher-za** » 21 Jul 2004, 15:51

NOTE: this is not a spinoff from Smallville

the point is to simply post a wierd story here, enjoy.

I read this one a few years ago, i hope i get it right.

There was once a rich businessman from Japan who was extremely happy even though he never married and thusly never sired children, he lived in a large mansion and he was extremely good in everything he did, almost as if he'd been blessed.
The one thing that made his life worthwile apart from his fortune was his dog, a loving labrador whom he loved like no other. He was even known to take this dog with him on business trips around the world and he cared for the dogs every need.
On one of his flights around the world the plane went down in a terrible storm, the pilot was killed and so were all the other passengers. Fortunately the businessman and his dog had survived but he'd been seriously injured during the crash. When he regained consciousness he realised that he was on the ground, his intestines all over the place and his dog feasting from his gaping wound.
He said to himself: "At least one of us won't be going hungry tonight"

bubble_boy · Post by **bubble_boy** » 21 Jul 2004, 16:09

that is so sad

kailinin · Post by **kailinin** » 21 Jul 2004, 16:16

why?

the dog was fine

Kher-za · Post by **Kher-za** » 21 Jul 2004, 16:16

yeah, where do i apply for amnesty?

bubble_boy · Post by **bubble_boy** » 21 Jul 2004, 16:24

youll probably find somewhere in the ward...

Kher-za · Post by **Kher-za** » 21 Jul 2004, 16:25

that's where we are

bubble_boy · Post by **bubble_boy** » 21 Jul 2004, 16:27

oh, so i haven`t escaped ?

kailinin · Post by **kailinin** » 21 Jul 2004, 16:29

naw, its impossible to escape.

Kher-za · Post by **Kher-za** » 21 Jul 2004, 16:30

i seem to have developed a headache from all this nonsense.

kailinin · Post by **kailinin** » 21 Jul 2004, 16:33

kick your desk really hard and you wont be worried anout your head anymore.

Psych0_Cr1tt3r · Post by **Psych0_Cr1tt3r** » 25 Jul 2004, 20:57

ROFLMAO @ Dog

This was posted before long ago, but just try and stop me from posting it again! :sly:

Two local men were seriously injured when their pick-up truck left the road and struck a tree near Cotton Patch on State Highway 38 early Monday morning. Woodruff County deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly after midnight Monday. Thurston Poole, 33, of Des Arc, and Billy Ray Wallis, 38, of Little Rock, are listed in serious condition at Baptist Medical Center. The accident occurred as the two men were returning to Des Arc after a frog gigging trip. On an overcast Sunday night, Poole's pick-up truck headlights malfunctioned. The two men concluded that the headlight fuse on the older model truck had burned out. As a replacement fuse was not available, Wallis noticed that the bullet from his pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next to the steering wheel column. Upon inserting the bullet, the headlights again began to operate properly, and the two men proceeded on east-bound toward the White River bridge. After travelling approximately twenty miles and just before crossing the river, the bullet apparently overheated, discharged and struck Poole in the right testicle. The vehicle swerved sharply to the right exiting the pavement and striking a tree. Poole suffered only minor cuts and abrasions from the accident, but will require surgery to repair the other wound. Wallis sustained a broken clavicle and was treated and released. "Thank God we weren't on that bridge when Thurston shot his balls off or we might both be dead," stated Wallis. "I've been a trooper for ten years in this part of the world, but this is a first for me. I can't believe that those two would admit how this accident happened", said Snyder. Upon being notified of the wreck, Lavinia, Poole's wife, asked how many frogs the boys had caught and did anyone get them from the truck

SmL9 · Post by **SmL9** » 25 Jul 2004, 22:24

Shame...

Friggs · Post by **Friggs** » 25 Jul 2004, 23:18

Man, that just confirms all the hillbilly jokes aren't actually jokes but true-life stories.... Damn, that is sad!

Grumpy · Post by **Grumpy** » 26 Jul 2004, 11:42

8O i can't belive someone would actually admit to something like that

kailinin · Post by **kailinin** » 26 Jul 2004, 11:47

it takes all types, but really - a bullet in an fuse socket 8O
how stupid do you need to be

Grumpy · Post by **Grumpy** » 26 Jul 2004, 11:59

it takes an exeptional kind of stupid methinks