How to ask "help me please" questions on a forum

[RuadRauFlessa]

sorry but there is no relevant place to create this topic and that in itself is insane and therefore it is now living in the Ward.

I find more and more people who does not know how to properly ask for help. So I did some digging (thanks Goooooooogle) and found a nice article for all to read.

http://www.catb.org/~esr/faqs/smart-questions.html

And now an example of how not to do it.
Discuss please.

[DAE_JA_VOO]

Dude, nobody's going to read all of that

[Ron2K]

I find more and more people who does not know how to properly ask for help. So I did some digging (thanks Goooooooogle) and found a nice article for all to read.

http://www.catb.org/~esr/faqs/smart-questions.html

You do know that article has been in my sig for the past few months, right?

[RuadRauFlessa]

Jip . Was actually searching for another article but found that this one is almost the best. Still no one seems to pay any heed to it.

I think however that the article has something missing. A not to say that you should not hi-jack someone else's thread with your own questions.

[WiK1d]

Question. Which bear is best?

[hamin_aus]

Pedo, of course.
What a silly question!

[rustypup]

I find more and more people who does not know

if you write like a semi-literate boob you will very likely be ignored

hoist by your petard, what

[Synthesis]

Try to find an answer by searching the archives of the forum you plan to post to.

What's the point? Start a new thread, if it's been asked and solved, some idiot will flame you by posting the original thread. problem solved.

Try to find an answer by searching the Web.

No, then nobody will ever have known I had a problem and my search for attention will not even begin.

Try to find an answer by reading the manual.

There are very few women on the technical forums. The rest of us, just don't do that. Are you even a guy?

Try to find an answer by reading a FAQ.

FAQ you too. This is family forum, you shouldn't be speaking like that!

Try to find an answer by inspection or experimentation.

Great, thanks for that advice. I'm on parole now, idiot!

Try to find an answer by asking a skilled friend.

Serious! That's the exact reason I do post here!

If you're a programmer, try to find an answer by reading the source code.

Wait, what?

[DarkStar]

One can also summurise it in this simple flash animation:

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/posting

[doo_much]

Synthesis, lol

[RuadRauFlessa]

Try to find an answer by searching the archives of the forum you plan to post to.

What's the point? Start a new thread, if it's been asked and solved, some idiot will flame you by posting the original thread. problem solved.

Create duplicate threads for the same issue and they will be locked.

Try to find an answer by searching the Web.

No, then nobody will ever have known I had a problem and my search for attention will not even begin.

The point is that you need to try solve the problem on your own first. People don't want to do your work for you.

Try to find an answer by reading the manual.

There are very few women on the technical forums. The rest of us, just don't do that. Are you even a guy?

RTFM. You will probably get stuck some time with a critical problem because you refrain from turning to a manual. They can be the single most helpful resource if you know how to read.

Try to find an answer by reading a FAQ.

FAQ you too. This is family forum, you shouldn't be speaking like that!

Now you are just being mindless. This is serious.

Try to find an answer by inspection or experimentation.

Great, thanks for that advice. I'm on parole now, idiot!

Why would you be on parole for trying to find a solution to a technical problem by inspecting the problem and doing experimentations regarding a possible solution.

Try to find an answer by asking a skilled friend.

Serious! That's the exact reason I do post here!

Oh so the only skilled friends you have is on the forum. Go figures.

If you're a programmer, try to find an answer by reading the source code.

Wait, what?

Yes read the source code. It is a language after all. Again this is provided that you can in fact read. For a software developer (programmer), source code can be the single greatest resource to solving any problem a program may throw out. Problem being that the source code is not always available. especially if it is proprietary.

[Synthesis]

All jokes aside, I agree 110% with this thread. I can rip it because I honestly feel I do my part as is suggested here. I very rarely start new threads. I will revive a 3 year old thread rather, if necessary. Proof is that I would estimate, 20% of my technical queries are ever solved and 50% even replied to. Further more I solve it on my own before coming here.

[hamin_aus]

I rarely, if ever have to ask technical questions on this, or any forum.
The last one I remember asking here that got answered was in 2003 or something. It was about dual-booting XP and 98, and OnlyOne helped me out.

If I do hit a wall, a Google will show me many instances where somebody else had a similar problem and got it answered, or at least got pointed in the right direction.