The Banana Republic thread

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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by StarPhoenix »

"Humankind cannot bear very much reality." T.S. Elliot
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Belix »

http://www.news24.com/SouthAfrica/News/ ... 20121001-3
Johannesburg – At least 60% of the crimes reported to the police's 10111 call centre do not get registered and are not investigated, The Star reported on Monday.

The SA Police Service's (SAPS) performance claims could not be verified because of a lack of administrative control, according to Auditor General Terence Nombembe.

So-called "positive incident reports" to 10111 call centres had to be entered on the SAPS case administration system (CAS) to generate a docket with a case number. But 58% of positive incident reports were not linked to dockets on the CAS.

Nombembe's findings are contained in the SAPS annual report for 2011/12 tabled in Parliament on Friday.

National Assembly police oversight committee acting chairperson, ANC MP Annelize van Wyk said 58% was "a huge number" that could not easily be explained away.

DA spokesperson on police, Dianne Kohler Barnard, said: "While citizens believe that their cases are being investigated by a SAPS that costs them R62.4bn per annum, the criminals will no doubt be delighted to hear that the majority of their activities are never even looked at by our ailing SAPS."

Nombembe gave SAPS an unqualified audit. The department spent 98.9% of its budget in 2011/12, leaving R617m unspent. This included R92m for detective services.
    
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Anakha56 »

not sure if serious... <_<

http://mg.co.za/article/2012-12-12-its- ... -knows-it/
ConCourt gets bid for Mayan apocalypse task team
12 Dec 2012 12:03 - Sapa

The Constitutional Court has received an "extremely urgent court application" for the creation of a "task team" to prepare for the end of the world.

This is according to a Beeld report on Wednesday. Robert Sefatsa (38), a Soweto resident, also stated in papers handed in at court that the government needed to form a new department to prepare for judgment day next Friday with an "investigative task team".

He suggested that the new state department should be called the "department of paranormal and esoteric sciences".

Sefatsa pointed out that according to the Mayan calendar, judgment day would be on December 21, and it was therefore a matter of extreme urgency that South Africa and other countries make their preparations for the apocalypse.

A commission of inquiry should include geologists, statisticians, astronomists, economists and extra-terrestrial technologists, and should be competent to cope with evacuation procedures, sea and air logistics, and resettlement, he said. – Sapa
Guess where our tax payer money might be going... :roll: IMHO World cant end quick enough... Do not want our stupidity crossing the universe... :/
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by KALSTER »

This can't be true, can it?
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by CapNemo »

:lol: according to the news last night it is :facepalm:
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by SykomantiS »

You can't be serious... :|

Troll of the month award? :P
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by KatrynKat »

if it was true, why didn't they start preparing for the apocalypse a few months ago...
why only start a few days before the "end of the world" date...

people in America in the tornado stretch are well prepared in advanced with their bunkers full of supplies and food...
even Sheldon Cooper had a bag ready under his bed with his emergency supplies :)
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by StarBound »

How exactly is a task force suppose to stop the end of the world?

Incidently I hear Skynet is going live on 21 December :P
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Anakha56 »

*sigh* WTH is up with the way these people think...

http://www.news24.com/SouthAfrica/News/ ... n-20130130
MEC: White road hogs avoid prison
2013-01-30 09:27

Cape Town - The Western Cape transport MEC says that people serving time for road offences were mostly black and coloured.

“If you want to kill someone on the roads, ensure that you are white,” MEC Robin Carlisle told the Cape Town Press Club, reported Die Burger.

He said white people usually avoided prison time as they could afford lawyers.

He said the biggest obstacle in fighting road deaths was the lack of consequences for road offences.

He slammed poor police work on accident scenes as well as “softer” sentences by courts.

He said the media should stigmatise people who caused road deaths.

“Our road safety campaign is controversial but very successful and would never have worked without the media,” he said.

He said he believed road deaths could be decreased by 22% if everyone buckled up.

He also said women caused only 4% of road deaths while 40% of motorists were female.
*drum roll* open mouth, insert foot

http://www.news24.com/SouthAfrica/News/ ... s-20130130
Girl knocked down, dragged by taxi - medics
2013-01-30 13:49

Johannesburg - An 8-year-old girl is in a critical condition after being hit by a taxi and dragged several metres in the Zandspruit informal settlement, near Honeydew, Gauteng paramedics said on Wednesday.

"The child has suffered serious injuries that included a broken leg and head trauma," said ER24 spokesperson Vanessa Jackson.

The schoolgirl, who was crossing the road when she was knocked down, was helped out from under the vehicle by witnesses, said Jackson.

She was airlifted to Chris Hani Baragwanath Hospital.
So who want to bomb the DA twitter feed?
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Tribble »

Tax on Graduates

Ummmmm don't graduates pay taxes when they work anyway? So they are being penalised for studying hard and being lucky enough to find a job? :shock: REALLY!!!!!
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by CapNemo »

Oh f...ing brilliant idea to solve our country's problem of idiots doing jobs that require skilled labour for instance being the freaking president
"I hear voices in my head but they are my own this time"
"Except for a battle lost, there is nothing so terrible as a battle won."
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Tribble »

Best reason to become a beggar on the street - no studying and no taxes.
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by CapNemo »

Oh and apparently they earn more than minimum wage
"I hear voices in my head but they are my own this time"
"Except for a battle lost, there is nothing so terrible as a battle won."
"Sanity is for the weak!!"
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Tribble »

Some really do. Must be lucrative or they wouldn't do it. I give to many people on my journeys.
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Anakha56 »

Actually if you do it right you can earn R600 in an hour ;). New street every week with a different outfit and a "Getting Married" sign will get you a lot of cash :).

In other news:

http://www.news24.com/SouthAfrica/News/ ... g-20130208
DA official held for trespassing
2013-02-08 20:03

Johannesburg - A DA Limpopo provincial legislature member was detained on Friday for allegedly trespassing at a textbook warehouse, the party said.

...
Now this is pretty much a yawn fest of a article until I get to this part:
Kennedy said she would not lay a charge with police because she was not injured. Her driver's licence, ID, and camera were confiscated, but returned after the photos were deleted.
Firstly in this country what are the chances that our cops are going to do a secure delete with multiple overwrites and rewrites of the sectors the photos occupied? Chances are slim to none. So the DA could easily run some recovery software on the device to retrieve said photos. Secondly, chances are that the phone is a BB and hopefully with a password protected pin so why not just press the power button off to lock the phone? They have no right to demand your pin from you and if they keep the phone it is theft in saying that the cops probably entered the pin in incorrectly 10 times causing a system format.

For an "intelligent" party the DA sure dont like to use their brains... :?

*edit*

Clarify my rant. It appears the camera was taking the pictures not the phone. Even better because if the SD card was returned with the camera you have much better chances of recovering the images.

Sorry for the rant but I see these excuses in news stories way to often and it grinds me because we have the tech to recover deleted items...
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Tribble »

Mmmm you have given me an idea there Anky.....
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Anakha56 »

http://www.news24.com/SouthAfrica/News/ ... g-20130226
Girl bitten by 'racist' dog
2013-02-26 08:47

Johannesburg - A Honeydew mother has accused a dog of being racist after the animal ran into her yard and bit her daughter.

The Sowetan reported that the 7-year-old daughter of Pam Nkosi was bitten on the knee by a neighbour’s bull terrier.

"I feel that the dog is racist. The way it behaved. It shows that it was not familiar with other races."

Nkosi said the dog’s owner did not come to check on her daughter and did not offer to help with the medical bills.

She said the dog’s owner, Sean Norman, was “impossible” and that police had to intervene after he denied that his dog had bitten the girl.

Nkosi said the Norman had not kept the dog’s vaccinations up to date and this put her daughter at risk of disease.

"He (Norman) said the child was bitten by another dog. He later said the child fell while walking near a hedge, but an emergency services report and doctor's letter confirmed the incident," Nkosi said.

The owner didn’t want to comment.

An SPCA inspector didn’t want to comment on whether the dog was "racist" or not but said the case was being investigated.

- News24
*sigh*

/facepalm...
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by CapNemo »

Can we shoot the mother I'm sure it will improve the average IQ slightly
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"Except for a battle lost, there is nothing so terrible as a battle won."
"Sanity is for the weak!!"
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Hman »

oh lord
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Belix »

http://www.news24.com/SouthAfrica/News/ ... e-20130304
News 24
Free State govt spends R140m on website
2013-03-04 11:06

Johannesburg - The Free State provincial government spent R140m on its website, it was reported on Monday.

Free State director general Elzabe Rockman signed a three-year contract to redesign the website in 2011, the Sowetan newspaper reported.

She had reportedly disputed the amount, claiming it was actually R40m.

The agreement was signed with businessman Tumi Ntsele, who reportedly holds tenders with several other provincial departments.

The Sowetan reported that the company was awarded the tender even though two other companies submitted significantly lower bids.

Etionee Bruwer, owner of web development company Jam Factory, told the newspaper the amount charged for the website was "ridiculous".

"The company that is working on that site is probably making R3.5m profit a month," he said.

Bruwer said the most paid for a website was R12m, by financial institutions which needed to protect sensitive information.

Ntsele told the newspaper opposition parties had an agenda against black businessmen and that the website's cost was fair.
    
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by GreyWolf »

Belix wrote:
News 24
Free State govt spends R140m on website
The best part is: it is built on Wordpress!
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Anakha56 »

I didnt know hamin was back in town! :shock:

http://www.news24.com/SouthAfrica/News/ ... N-20130402
Panty thief on the loose in KZN
2013-04-02 12:07

Durban - A panty thief has been harassing a KwaZulu-Natal community near Durban, according to a report on Tuesday.

Women in Phoenix, north of Durban, have seen a well-dressed man walk up to their washing lines and take their panties, the Sowetan newspaper reported.

One woman had lost seven panties to the man, while another woman said the thief stole her panties but left behind her mother-in-law's briefs.

"It is obvious that he is getting some sort of sexual pleasure from this because he only steals sexy lingerie," she said.

"It's sickening. It is theft but I don't think the police will waste their time looking for him, so I have not laid a complaint."

Durban-based clinical psychologist Cathrin Venter told the newspaper that stealing panties was part of a sexual fetish linked to observing or handling underwear worn by others.

"I have many patients who come for counselling when they have been caught," she said.

"They do it because they want a signed document to say that they are seeking counselling to lessen their penalty."

Venter said buying panties would not be as pleasurable as stealing them for those with the fetish.

- SAPA
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by CapNemo »

:facepalm: must be a slow news day
"I hear voices in my head but they are my own this time"
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"Sanity is for the weak!!"
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by Tribble »

Oh my - they should dry their unmentionables inside in future.
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Re: The Banana Republic thread

Post by CapNemo »

Oh I was going to sugest a claimore mine with tripwire switch :dontknow:
"I hear voices in my head but they are my own this time"
"Except for a battle lost, there is nothing so terrible as a battle won."
"Sanity is for the weak!!"
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